To Dad.. With Love

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Yesterday was my dad’s birthday.  I call him Deuta. He is a centenarian now!  Having him around me the past 19 yrs of my life I never realized life could be so incomplete without your father around you. But since the past 5 years that I have been away from him really made me wish that I were small again… back at the time when I could cling on to him whenever I wished!

Now when I look back at my early years I realized that the earliest memory I have is also of a day with dad. My first day at school! I remember him coming with me to my Alma matter SJC. I remember being quite composed all the way to school and even after entering the gates. It was an alien territory for me. But even then I had felt secured. I was secured that Deuta won’t leave me alone.

My father must have thought that his daughter is a brave little girl; composed even in the midst of all the crying and wailing of my classmates. I was walking quite confidently beside my father, confident of the fact that he is not going to abandon me in this new place. But then I suddenly realized that I was walking alone. He was not there with me anymore. I turned back only to find him waiting and asking me to go forward, waving and encouraging me to take the final steps alone. It was then that the stark reality gripped me. I suddenly realized that now my father is not going to go any further with me and that I shall be left alone. Out of my secured little world….Fear started surging through me and I lost all composure. I didn’t want to disappoint him but could hold it no longer. It started with a weep …and then went beyond control. Deuta dint know what to do. I am sure his heart must have broken seeing his daughter losing her composure. But then I couldn’t help it either. I just looked at him and went on crying. No words spoken…. but I am sure he knew what I wanted to say….Just as he does even today…

"Phir Mile Sur" ??

Saturday, January 30, 2010


So India turned 62 this year!!!
Yet another year added to its glorious years of Independence. 
Yet another colorful parade displaying “Unity in diversity”
Yet another day when our hearts saluted the power and the discipline of the Indian Armed Forces
Yet another day when we felt our hearts inflated with pride at the sound of the National Anthem
Yet other day when we rose to show our respects for the Nation

But on an afterthought,… it was also ……
Yet another day when we gladly took trips home on a long weekend (calling sick for one day off course!!)
Yet another day when we a lot of us thanked the Indian Govt. for public holidays
And not to forget … Yet another DRY Day!!! :D

Yes … These were some of the things that happened these Republic Day as it’s had been happening since many years now, letting us feel pride as well as joy.  This day at the beginning of the year reminds us strongly of our identity and citizenship and lets us feel proud of it… Till off course Independence Day, when this feeling is revived letting us bask in the glory of the Nation again!

But this Republic Day, along with the aforementioned, also saw some new beginnings. For a starter it was the introduction of Monorail,(http://news.oneindia.in/2010/01/26/trialrun-of-monorail-successful-in-mumbai.html) a long dream come true.

 But this year we also saw something, which we grew up with, in an all new avatar!!!
Yes … I am talking about the “Phir Mile Sur” video!

I am sure all of us must have seen the video at least once given the fact that it was made utterly unavoidable on TV!!  Every time u turned on the idiot box it was there staring right at your face!

But I have to agree that this was a nice change and an equally appreciable initiative!

Our country has come a long way since independence and grown in leaps and bounds! It was time that we acknowledged the fact through a medium that all of us would relate to. And what better than Mile Sur Mera Tumhara!! This song had become a second anthem of sorts and I can bet that all of us who grew up with it knew it by heart. It had the ability to give us goose bumps and make us feel proud at being Indians … at being part of such a diverse culture…one that is hardly found anywhere else in the world!

But, though it was indeed a brave initiative… I strongly felt that it was, sadly, a Half  Hearted one...

Certain things in the video, I must say were very well thought about. For example:

            Many people and fields of excellence got their due. The inclusion of the Armed Forces was a much required one. Similarly, we also saw the inclusion of a lot many sports persons from different parts of India which was very acknowledging.

 Salman Khan with the differently abled kids was a real heart warmer! On a similar note Aamir Khan’s presence with the kids…was also a good capture. If only the song at that point of time would not have been “Aye Kya Bolti Tu” types. That was an ear sore!! The inclusion of Shiamak Davar for the fusion was also well thought of.

But what irritated me or I should say put my brain on a “hemorrhage mode” was the presence of so many people who were not required at all!! People like Deepika Padukone, Shahid Kapoor, Ranbir Kapoor. What the hell was Deepika Padukone doing there in the horrendous yellow outfit? Getting drenched and doing what?????

Really people...The greater part of the second part were an eye sore, save the ending portion. Presence of people like Sharukh Khan is still justifiable. If the presence of celebrities is so important then why not include the likes of Akshay Kumar, Irfan Khan Nandita Das etc. They are doing marvelous job in their profession and are a more diverse lot!

Sometimes I really wonder if the presence of so many stars is necessary, given the fact that there are so many people from so many different walks of life succeeding and bringing pride to India.The absence of people like Ragavendra Singh Rathore who saved our faced at the Olympics; World class players like Vishwanathan Anand; sports like Hockey and Cricket; World famous Industrialists …also made me think that whether these contributions are regarded as worth acknowledging at all. Sports stars though quite a few this time, were again given slots such that before you realize who they were, they vanish… POOF!! I also wonder why did the makers refrain from showing the players in there proud award receiving moments. Those are moments that should be shown over and over again!!! The young lot of politicians, for that matter, should also have also been mentioned !

But amidst these goof ups one can still not deny that it was good to see the coming together of the old and new in the field of music. The modern picture of India that the makers try to capture was still captured quite well.

The reason behind my criticism may be the fact that I was among the many of us who grew up with the original song and are reluctant to let go off the classic feel of the song. But as they say Change is constant… I’m sure the new generation will adapt to this version of the song. Just like how we despise most of the remixed old melodies and then get used to it…. Phir Mile Sur too, surely will also grow on us.

But whatever be the case, when we have to give our children the view of the India that was before…the culturally diverse and the naturally adorable one, I would still stick to the original one !!! May be the “Phir Mile”version can follow!!! :D

TaGGed !!!!



Thanks for tagging Standbymind!! You indeed were right !!!
Life’s worth giving a chance to visit the darker side !!
All the sweet sounding resolutions are anyways meant to be broken!!  So why not try out the darker ones this year???!!
Well pardon me for taking this long to come up with the resolutions.  But here I am… Back to Bite U!
My 1st dark resolution for the year will be to follow some of my dark dreams that I have been having!!!  They are dark and they are nasty …!!! Waiting to live them!!!  
Also, a TRIP to the wilder side of me is definitely on the list!!!
Beating the shit outta some people is also something that has been pending for quite some time now!! This year definitely will be done!!
I may also be hitchhiking my way to some place this year!!! And have all the fun that I can on the way!!!
Finally, this year one week for sure I will try practicing dark dressing for a week!!! Will see if I can look the part of a Goth!

Of Demons Within...

Monday, November 2, 2009


It wasn’t the best night that they had. But still he lay there beside her, spent and wishing for more. He recalled the night that just passed. He recalled the evening, which brought with it the presence of this woman whom he loved. They had had spent the evening in the way they loved it best. They dined, they talked, they laughed. And just as the evening merged into the night, differences fell apart giving way to fulfillment….

Now, she was lying beside him. He held her in his arms and held her close. As he felt the warmth of her bosom against his chest, he wondered what has she done that his life has changed just by her mere presence. He looked at her face. It spoke of bliss. And just as he reciprocated her unpretentious gaze, he could not help feeling her love for him.

He knew that this woman is someone he never wants to lose. She was his indeed, his better half, literally. With her, he has finally found the much wanted stability in his life, after all the futile relationships in his past. And now he couldn’t imagine his life without her.


As his thoughts followed stream, she rose from his arms. His hands followed her as she caressed her hair to tie them into a careless knot. She walked towards the door. His eyes followed her till she disappeared behind the doors. He couldn’t let his minds off her. He wondered how on earth can one being so complete with beauty. And as he watched her coming back towards him, he realized that his his eyes couldn’t do the justice that her beauty demanded. He suddenly felt incapacitated by her.

She came and sat beside him. His eyes travelled through the length of her torso. He could feel every inch of her skin with his bare eyes. Her face spoke of bliss, her neck of pride and her bosom of fulfillment. As he pondered over his thoughts, she spoke to him. She spoke of the evening and the night. She smiled and kissed him thanking him for making her day special. But amidst the beauty of the moment, his mind drifted. He noticed something on her, something that erased everything that just happened.

He saw that her bosom bore marks. Marks that spoke of force and of unwanted presence. He asked himself. Was it him? Was he to be blamed for it? Was he so harsh on her? He couldn’t imagine having done that. But even then, he questioned himself again. His mind ran through the entire evening and the evenings gone by. But still he couldn’t bring himself to blame for it.

Then what could have caused it? He tried not to think of her as promiscuous. But he couldn’t. His love suddenly gave was to despise. It didn’t even take a blink of his eye to imagine her cheating on him. Just as easily as he had imagined her to be a goddess, he created a devil out of her.  He wondered where did he lack that she had to look for love with somebody else.

Just then, she saw him lost in thoughts. She shook him. She was disappointed that he didn’t hear even a single word of what she spoke to him. She asked him again, “Did u hear what I just said?” He couldn’t reply. He stared at her blankly. She came closer to him. “Do you realize something huney? Our little bundle of joy has turned even prettier!  Just today I realized that she has got two tiny little pearly teeth! See what she did today…!!” and she pointed out to the marks on her bosom. “Don’t you think it’s beautiful??!!” 

She closed her eyes and hugged him .. “Huney, I can’t thank you enough for this miracle of life that we created …………..”

His mind went blank…………

How Silly..!!

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


As I sat on the nice warm couch of CCD kissing my Frappe today, I travelled in a time machine…literally!!

Thanks to a lovely young couple a few tables away!! I flipped nearly 7 years back in time in the blink of an eyelid. To the days when I was like one of them…in high school ! They were young and lovely and most of all ..trying soooooo hard!!! It was so evident that something was cooking between them!. The girl a mix of innocence and youthful adolcense and the guy a budding young man were such a refreshing sight. 


I could already visualize the next day at school for each of them!!!The girl all huddled up by her gang for ‘what happened on the date!!’ and the guy boasting of his achievement!!! They might have been on their first date [[or may be not! This may be a little too much to ask from youngsters now a days!! The great Gen Y emerging!!! Way advanced!! ]] But first date or not … they were lovely and a pleasure of sight!!!

High School … The days filled with careless emotions and fun filled encounters which were later hot topics for gossip!! Oh... how eagerly we used to wait for the next day at school to unwrap all the gossip … piece by piece …and ready to do it all over again...And again and again!!!

I still remember how I once rolled over myself and literally peeled my knees while running along with my girl gang to see one of seniors talking to her “boyfriend” !!! I still have the memoir of that incident …The eye shaped mark on my left knee!!! Man I dint know what to say mum when I went back home!!And to add to that my kid sister had seen it all happen and I had to bribe keep her mouth shut! I swear .. an episode !! But was worth it!!! We ultimately got to see the mysterious young man from the 'Out of Bounds' Boys School who was known to be a Casanova !!! ;)

And there were the days of serious disappointments when your friends had something to say about their respective boyfriends and you didn’t. It looks funny today when I think of it. But then it was a serious issue which could even give you inferiority complex!! And in case this happens to be the bitch who you hate, she would leave no stone unturned to make you feel miserable!!

But bitches or not these days are just ageless! Though silly but brings a smile on your lips even in the toughest of times. Cherish them and they will entertain you forever!

Today I really wished I never grew up! But someone has rightly said u don’t know the value of a thing until you lose it. And so here I am … reminiscing and relishing those days. Now when I look back at my days at high school I feel … “Man ..!! Was I really like this!!! How silly …!” But I guess it is nothing but these silly little insignificant memories that can live me through a lifetime!!!

There You Light ...

Sunday, September 13, 2009


There you light..
But the naïve flame
Can kill burn and lame..
The thoughts that you seek to kill,
Are the ones that gave you the will…
Nevermind the wounds and bites
Let them be there
As a reminiscence of pain
Let them be there and tell their tale
Sure you light
But to fight
Not the past
But THE NIGHT
Fight the evil
Be the KNIGHT….
There you light …

(Thanks to Standbymind for the inspiration)